Black stockings with lace tops, red lace French knickers - when you have a rounded arse like mine they look very sexy, and a pair of red boots with a high stiletto heel. I wore a black silk wrap around dress over the top, no buttons or zips just a tie belt.

By the time I got to the hotel I had butterflies in my stomach, I told him to wait in the bar and there he was. Every bit as gorgeous as I remembered. He ordered me a drink and took my coat and I could see him looking me up and down, the dress was clinging to my body and I knew he could see the outline of my underwear.

He asked me if I wanted anything to eat, and all I could do was smile,

“Later maybe, why don’t you show me the room”...

One finger was pointing. Not knowing why, Carolyn murmured “thank you”, and walked into the room. It held only one painting, but it seemed too small to hold even that. A woman smiled at Carolyn, directly at her, a knowing smile, a smile that cut right through Carolyn. This woman had what Carolyn wanted. She moved closer to the canvas, she wanted to touch it, to rip the woman off the wall. She raised one arm, fingertips outstretched.
“Don’t turn around,” a voice breathed behind her. “Just act natural. Act like you and I are both just looking at the painting.” Normally Carolyn would whip around and mace anyone who said that, but this voice spoke to be obeyed. It made the hairs on her neck tingle, but in a good way...

Q: It’s easy for women to spice things up in the bedroom with sexy lingerie but what can us men do to make things more exciting? I don’t fancy putting on a shiny silver g-string.

A: You are right that it’s easy for women as lingerie will do it almost every time. According to esoteric philosophy men are naturally the voyeurs who gaze adoringly, whilst women are the natural “exhibitionists” who love the attention, being adored and worshipped. What this means for you is that you can heave a huge sigh of relief, that, as much as you don’t want to wear the spandex g-string, it probably won’t do much for her either.

Even in modern western culture we know that men’s sexual response is mainly visual, and the Tao seemed to know this a few thousand years earlier.

To spice things up, why not slip into your natural role of the voyeur instead by doing what she will love. Adore her. All you have to do is to worship her body. Keep the lights on, but low, and admire every inch of her skin, caress it, not only with your hands, but your eyes. Invite her to be the exhibitionist, to display her beauty to you. Let her know you want to feast your eyes on every bit of her. Make appreciative comments and noises...

I've loved noncon and have had rape fantasies since as far back as I can remember. We're talking about feeling aroused—or whatever you can call arousal when you're a proto-sexual child—watching Care Bears and My Little Ponies trapped on conveyor belts, watching Donald Duck getting stripped for an exam, tying up Barbies naked and constructing elaborate abduction scenarios with Legos. Sex didn't really excite me unless there was some element of threat or force. (Witness also the genesis of my preferences for bondage, exposure and medical kink, heh.)

Liking fictional rape was a huge source of confusion and shame for me growing up. My friends made grossed-out or disturbed faces when I talked about who I thought were sexy, sexually threatening villains in movies or showed them Mary Sue scenes I'd written. I would blush when something noncon-y occurred in a movie or TV show that I was watching with my parents; it took me years to figure out that that was because I thought they'd know I was turned on by it. It didn't even have to be an out-and-out rape scene. Because, honestly! The Emperor zapping Luke Skywalker until he writhed on the ground! Gul Madred stripping and suspending Captain Picard! Gary Oldman stroking terrified girls' faces in Air Force One and The Professional! The beginning of just about every Law & Order: SVU episode! *shivers with joy* No one I knew shared my predilections, so I learned to keep quiet about them....

Why are cheating wives so popular? You'd expect that would not be something men would like to think about.

It's one of the top interests all around the world. Men are wired to be sexually jealous. And, certainly, men can fly into murderous rages, but simultaneously they're also sexually aroused.

This is an example of what biologists call a sperm competition cue. Across the animal kingdom, when males see other males mating, it tends to provoke arousal. If he is going to compete with the other male, he has to produce more sperm

Human men also respond like this, if a man sees a woman — including his partner — with another man, he becomes more aroused...